Socially Gifted

I’m about to blaspheme, so those of you who are of a sensitive nature may want to skip to the next paragraph. There are some questions that Google can’t answer. Sure, if you need to know how is babby formed or things Mil Millington and his girlfiend have argued about, you’re good, no need to worry.

Some questions that an author must research go so far outside what everyday people have to deal with, things for which a simple web search isn’t enough. For these things, I like to use… wait for it… Facebook.

Just think about it. Despite my crippling awkwardness and anti-social behavior, there are literally dozens of people who have nominally agreed to be my friend.They come from all walks of life, from the criminally insane indigents to the reasonably respectable.

Just in my small circle of friends, I have rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists!

Wait, that last bit was from Blazing Saddles. Scratch that.

So, tonight, I was looking for two pieces of information. First I wanted to know whether a sitting judge could defend someone in a criminal case. I wasn’t having any luck, and then I realized that I had a Facebook friend who is a law student. Then, I was wondering what liabilities a law officer had for damaged caused in executing a no-knock warrant. When I didn’t find anything, right away, I realized there was a reserve officer in my friends list, and I sent away message two.

Now, I know there is a chance that I might get led astray by their answers, but even if their answers aren’t 100% accurate, they are still going to be close enough for the air of plausibility.

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